Chances are you’re married to a liberated woman.
A woman who identifies, to some degree, as a feminist.
In my experience, that brings no small weight to the relationship.
Her heart is torn both towards and away from men.
She has many voices in her head, telling her how she should be as a woman, and how YOU should be as a man.
You are bewildered, because so often, the voices are telling her completely different things.
She is bewildered, too.
She wants you to help with the laundry.
She wants you to take turns doing the cooking.
She wants an “equal marriage.”
She wants to see proof you are the “conscious man” she hopes you are, not just another asshole “like all the rest.”
BUT… she also wants you to open the door for her.
She wants YOU to turn away the drunk at the door… YOU to go get her phone for her from the car when it’s dark and windy outside.
Your woman may ACT like she wants your love more than your strength…
…that if she had to choose, she would take your love, and leave your strength in the cave…
But you know the truth. You know that she needs and WANTS both.
Be patient with her distrust of male strength.
After all, strength is tricky.
Strength is dangerous.
Strength is the club that men have wielded over women since the dawn of time.
There are times where her body shakes with rage or grief at the things men have done to women across the world, and across time… and you don’t know whether to hang your head in shame or hold her in your arms.
Millions of men around the world are pouring their strength out on the ground to appease their women.
After all, it’s what they SEEM to want.
But STRENGTH and LOVE held in equal tension… THAT is the hallmark of a fully-formed man.
Man is but a shadow if he abandons one to cling to the other.
The man who shirks love for the sake of strength is an asshole.
The man who shirks strength for the sake of love is a coward.
Do not cut off your strength to prove love, even if she asks you to.
It will do you no favors and only add scorn to impotence.
BE TO HER a man equally of love and strength.
Be what she doesn’t even know she needs.
Great post brother!
Totally agree with you on this. Tony Robbins has a video out there on YouTube that talk about displays the results of living in the extreme of either the asshole or the coward. We men can find ourselves being caught in what is termed the “double bind”, a kind of can’t win for losing. The main thing is when we go to the extreme of being ultra soft and passive because our being bold men can scare them, they hate us because we have lost what excites and scares them at the same time. If we are too bold as men, we are asshole that are too scary for them. So we must find the balance as you say in this post and in my mind be brave enough to keep it a bit more on the bold side of being a man.
Women too are struggling to find what roles males are to play in their lives and the lives of their children. It is not new however. Much like cops shooting blacks, it is just more obvious. Money solves many problems with racism and sexism. If she feels she can afford to be taken care of she can let her YIN energy out too! A females power lay there as well. She has to YANG it to the outside world if her husband cannot supply protection and provisions for her and the children. That is why society is experimenting with males in the kitchen and as nurses since the 1980’s. Robots have taken up the heavy lifting and women are trying to help men find their way but males really have to do this on their own. Let her bring home the bacon if the man cannot though because nothing causes more stress than health issues but after that….money is second.
Save your love and strength for someone who is willing to show men basic respect as a human being.
One’s response to the “liberated” (selfish, arrogant man hater) woman should be to go MGTOW.
Look it up. Watch some vids on it. Save yourself the grief.
Heck yeah SP! The best reaction is a complete and total overreaction!