You wake at dawn.
Wife and kiddos are all asleep.
The sun rises and the birds sing as you sip your coffee, banging out your masterpiece in a flood of creative bliss.
Nice thought, isn’t it.
You’ve likely taken a stab at “becoming a morning person.”
But I’m betting it didn’t stick.
In my experience, the number one reason men fail to become a morning person is because they resort to PUSH energy when they should be constructing pull.
When you “push” yourself to get to bed by ten so you can wake up at six, your inner lazy-ass just sees lack and loss.
You’re STACKING punishments:
Going to bed early means NOT watching that next episode of your favorite show, PLUS you’ll have to drag your carcass out of bed in the pre-dawn dark just a few hours later.
Pain. Misery. Self-denial.
So you have to rely on brute force and willpower and all the ugly big gun stuff just to get your ass in and out of the bed.
And you know what? That works for a little while.
But then one of your kids wakes up and vomits on the carpet or the new season of Game of Thrones starts or your wife has a bad day and wants to talk it over with a glass of wine in the evening and then OH SHIT… the hard-won spell is broken.
Back to the blear.
That’s why I recommend the PULL approach instead.
Think back to Christmas Eve as a kid. You begged your parents to go to bed early so morning would come faster.
And when morning came, you could not be contained. You ripped off the covers and pounded down the stairs to see what loot lay beneath the tree.
That, my friend, is the perfect picture of pull… when the day ahead is so pregnant with possibility and excitement that staying up late is not even a consideration. The usual base enticements of TV or web-surfing or facebook simply hold no sway.
You may think those days are gone. But they can be recreated.
Here’s how:
Instead of pushing yourself to bed, plant little delights and rewards and curiosities that you are so eager to inspect and smell and pluck that you cannot help but rush to bed each evening.
Launch the product.
Send the scandalous email.
Set the campaign live.
Post your jaw-dropping announcement.
Then, when you reach the moment of truth at ten or whenever it is you’ve promised yourself you’ll go to bed… instead of that usual twinge of “nothing to look forward to but work tomorrow,” you’ll have a little surge of excitement:
Oh yeah, I did X today. I wonder how Y will respond? I’ll know by morning…
And there it is. In one fell swoop you’ve removed that little scab of resistance that’s been foiling your plans and keeping you so bleary-eyed.
So forget about the Ambien and bedtime tea and all that other push shit.
Focus all your energy on making bold moves.
Ask yourself each morning what terrifying-to-plant but intoxicating-to-harvest seeds you can sow right now, immediately, before cooler heads prevail.
See you at dawn, brother.
Good advice, Bryan.
In the past few weeks, I have been reading your articles and they have brought me passion and inspiration. I have a fiancé and 9 month old son. Am currently working as an apprentice to become an electrician, and I am in recovery from drugs and alcohol going on 3 and a half years. I know what it means to use spiritual practice to obtain sobriety, but have struggled maintaining that feeling in everyday life with everyday situations. For the past year and a half, I have struggled with balance. This idea of this 3 legged stool of recovery, work, and family. When one flourishes, the other two suffer. I have always put dividers between the 3, thinking if I could just balance this stool right, then it will not tip. Through your articles and book, I am coming to realize that these are not 3 separate entities. These are all life. MY LIFE. I have lived the way of the coward waiting for that shoe to drop when everything would be grand and perfect scenario to catch a break and feel at ease. That day will never come. I have begun to get lit. I have begun to get my fire back. I cannot tell you how thankful for your experience and suggestions I am.
Glad to hear it AJ!