Below is a compilation of Frequently Asked Questions about the nuts and bolts of GET SHIT DONE.
Dark Goals
What should I do if I don’t feel energized, but rather frustrated, about my Dark Goals?
The two most common reasons that I see for these feelings of frustration are:
1. Their dark goals are too overly ambitious and therefore too overwhelming and abstract to feel a sense of motivation towards them on a daily basis.
2. Their dark goals don’t have a clear endpoint upon which someone might feel a sense of accomplishment.
In the first situation, someone might set a dark goal for their wealth pillar that says they want to “become financially free”. While I would never discourage someone from trying to become financially free, I would argue that is actually more of a light goal than a dark goal. Even further, it’s so much of a light goal that it’s what I would call a “no shit” goal. You want to be financially free? No shit, everyone does. But that is such an abstract, pie in the sky goal for most people, that it really holds no fire, no electricity, and no direction to motivate you in the trenches of your daily life.
But what if instead, you said your wealth dark goal was to “add one new passive income stream”? Now we’re getting somewhere. That feels more exciting, and more real. That opens up so many possibilities, and it can get your gears turning. It’s a much clearer goal. Now you can picture the activities you might do to achieve that goal–researching types of passive income, deciding what makes sense for you, figuring out how much passive income you can realistically make, etc. If that still seems too abstract for you, maybe add a dollar amount, or a deadline, to make it more clear and give yourself a specific endpoint.
Do goals need to have an endpoint, or can they be ongoing, such as a daily habit?
There are two different types of goals. There are outcome goals, which have a specific endpoint, and there are process goals, which are based more on an ongoing process or activity.
A dark goal such as “add one new passive income stream” or “add one thousand dollars per month in passive income by October” is an outcome goal. It’s clear when you achieve that goal. But process goals can be a bit more tricky.
A process goal might be to meditate every day, or read a book per month. That’s fine, but make sure you have some way of knowing when you’ve achieved your goal. While outcome goals tend to make better dark goals, you can still use process goals as dark goals, but you have to be careful you don’t find yourself feeling like you’re running on a hamster wheel instead of achieving an actual goal.
And by the way, process goals can be used as a means to achieve outcome goals. Your electrifying paths are the actions you’ll take to work towards your dark goals, so process goals can work well in defining your electrifying paths.
Should Dark Goals be SMART Goals?
SMART is an acronym that stands for specific, measurable, achievable (or attainable), realistic (or relevant), and time-bound, and the idea is that your goals should meet all of these criteria. While smart goals can be powerful, I often find it to be too burdensome to have to put your dark goals through this sort of checklist, where by doing so they lose some of the emotional charge and attachment you had to them when you stated them in their raw form. That’s why we recommend to just use the “realistic to BHAG” scale that Bryan teaches, because it’s a lot simpler.
Can I change my Dark Goals?
It depends. While you don’t want to make a habit of changing your goals, since then you’ll never accomplish anything, you need to make sure your goals are motivating for you. That doesn’t mean the first time you are hit with adversity you go ahead and change your dark goal. It isn’t supposed to be easy. But, if there’s a fundamental reason why you feel like you need to make a small modification to a dark goal, such as giving it a deadline, or clarifying some other endpoint, or if you feel you need to replace it altogether, go ahead and do it. If your dark goal is to get a new car, but then you lost your job, well then your circumstances have changed and maybe that new car is no longer relevant for you, and it’s time to shift your dark goal to something related to getting a new job. On the other hand, maybe some people might use that new car as motivation for getting a great new job. So it’s really up to you. Remember, your dark goals are yours and yours alone. If they’re not motivating you, figure out why, and make any adjustments that might be necessary to get that inspiration back.
The lessons recommend not sharing my Dark Goals with anyone–why are you asking me to share them in my Fire Team?
Your fire team consists of men who are removed from your personal life. When you’re surrounded by nurturing, non-judgemental people who want to see you succeed, you don’t have to worry about sharing things with them. We’ve seen people in their highest highs and their lowest lows. We seen men battle addictions, alcoholism, abuse, masturbation, suicide, you name it. We’ve had people whom we recommended seek professional help (there are many men in here who are in therapy, some are open about it, some are not, doesn’t matter either way). We understand it’s not always easy for someone to share their private thoughts and goals, but that is the path to accountability and support of getting you where you want to be. None of that stuff leaves your Fire Team unless you want it to. In that sense, that is your private space. And if you’re still not comfortable sharing, you could always abbreviate or just give high level descriptions that make sense to you without going into detail for the group.
Bold Moves
Do my Bold Moves need to be related to my Dark Goals?
Not necessarily, but it’s recommended. Bold Moves are a key factor in making progress towards your Dark Goals, so the more closely aligned your Bold Moves are with your Dark Goals, the more quickly you’ll be able to reach those Dark Goals.
Can I do more than one Bold Move in a given week?
Absolutely! While you will only receive points for one Bold Move per week, you are free to make as many Bold Moves as you can handle in a given week to move you towards your various Dark Goals. Some people regularly take 3-5 Bold Moves each week. If you’re just starting out, however, it is recommended to ease into it and focus on just one Bold Move per week so you don’t overwhelm yourself.
Process
What do I do if I fall behind? How do I catch up without feeling overwhelmed?
This program is meant to be the operating system for your life, so if you are feeling like it is hard keeping up with this along with everything else in life, then you’re not using it in the most effective way. You should get to the point where it’s the opposite—where you would have trouble keeping up with everything in life without using this system.
As for getting behind, no matter what, stay current with the current week if you can. Go back and do the past lessons in order when you have time. You can do as many past lessons as you have time for, it’s really just a matter of what you can handle. You won’t get points for doing assignments from prior weeks, but you will benefit from going through those assignments.
When you’re in a low, focus on your Daily Action Plans to get you organized and move forward. Then look at what bold moves you can make each week to move the needle on your dark goals.
Support
How do I get answers to my Get Shit Done-related questions?
Reach out to “@Coach Anthony Johnson” via Slack anytime. You can also post in your fire team or in the general community within Slack to see what others are doing.
How do I get billing or other Third Way Man support?
Send an email to support@thirdwayman.com and we’ll be happy to help you out.